When you do something that makes you feel uncomfortable there is always a lesson and opportunity to come out of it. If it doesn’t scare you in some way, you are not growing.
I have a competition coming up this weekend (more on that later), and my mind is basically finding every reason on why I won’t be good enough to do well. Change the tape right? It’s the fear and lack of confidence in self… It has a way of sneaking in on us, testing our beliefs. I say confidence in self because these moments in time test your internal state. Am I whole in myself? Or am I still working on it?
Here’s what I know for sure… and that is the only place I could start. I know that regardless of how scared I am, I am doing it. I’m already victorious on just that point alone. I also know that as soon as I start I will realize that I do deserve to be there and that I am amongst my peers. I am always my hardest critic.
What I would like prior to this: To be able to set a clear intention on how I (not anyone else) want to perform. I want to be clear on my own feelings and what my desire is for doing this. I want to shh the internal debate on my ‘wowness’ and put that energy into ‘doing’.
Wish me luck.